Razzmatazz from the Web

After 12: Remember This Next Time You Pose For A Party Picture

Sun, 09 Oct 2011 01:58:25 +0100

After 12: Remember This Next Time You Pose For A Party Picture:

The party doesn’t really start until After 12!

Oct 7, 2011 - Ten Years Later

Sat, 08 Oct 2011 12:38:13 +0100

Oct 7, 2011 - Ten Years Later:

Westboro Church Announces Protest of Steve Jobs’ Funeral…on an iPhone

Fri, 07 Oct 2011 09:54:59 +0100

Westboro Church Announces Protest of Steve Jobs’ Funeral…on an iPhone:

The fringe crazies at Westboro Church are going to protest Steve Jobs’ funeral for…well, for reasons I can’t possibly explain. As best I can tell, they believe this titan of capitalism should have…

At Least They Don’t Think You’re a Whale?

Mon, 19 Sep 2011 14:16:06 +0100

At Least They Don’t Think You’re a Whale?:

Graph by: Unknown

Choose an Irrelevant Skill When Asked "What Are Your Weaknesses?" in a Job Interview [Job Interview]

Wed, 27 Jul 2011 00:08:56 +0100

Choose an Irrelevant Skill When Asked "What Are Your Weaknesses?" in a Job Interview [Job Interview]:

If you’ve been in a job interview before, you’ve likely been asked about your weaknesses. The common advice is to pick a weakness that really isn’t one at all, but that doesn’t…

Pretending to Do One of These Things to Avoid You

Tue, 21 Jun 2011 21:46:47 +0100

Pretending to Do One of These Things to Avoid You:

Graph by:

andime

"1. Don’t pick on the weak. It’s immoral. Don’t antagonize the strong without cause, its stupid. 2...."

Mon, 13 Jun 2011 22:07:16 +0100

“1. Don’t pick on the weak. It’s immoral. Don’t antagonize the strong without cause, its stupid.
2. Don’t hate women. It’s a waste of time
3. Invest in yourself. Material things come to those that have self actualized.
4. Get in a fistfight, even if you are going to lose.
5. As a former Marine, take it from me. Don’t join the military, unless you want to risk getting your balls blown off to secure other people’s economic or political interests.
6. If something has a direct benefit to an individual or a class of people, and a theoretical, abstract, or amorphous benefit to everybody else, realize that the proponent’s intentions are to benefit the former, not the latter, no matter what bullshit they try to feed you.
7. Don’t be a Republican. They are self-dealing crooks with no sense of honor or patriotism to their fellow citizens. If you must be a Republican, don’t be a “conservative.” They are whining, bitching, complaining, simple-minded self-righteous idiots who think they’re perpetual victims. Listen to talk radio for a while, you’ll see what I mean.
8. Don’t take proffered advice without a critical analysis. 90% of all advice is intended to benefit the proponent, not the recipient. Actually, the number is probably closer to 97%, but I don’t want to come off as cynical.
10. Don’t undermine your fellow young men. Mentor the young men that come after you. Society recognizes that you have the potential to be the most power force in society. It scares them. Society does not find young men sympathetic. They are afraid of you, both individually and collectively. Law enforcement’s primary purpose is to suppress you.
11. As a young man, you’re on your own. Society divides and conquers. Unlike women who have advocates looking out for them (NOW, Women’s Study Departments, government, non-profit organizations, political advocacy groups) almost no one is looking out for you.
12. Young men provide the genius and muscle by which our society thrives. Look at the Silicone Valley. By in large, it was not old men or women that created the revolution we live. Realize that society steals your contributions, secures it with our intellectual property laws, and then takes credit and the rewards where none is due.
13. Know that few people have your best interests at heart. Your mother does. Your father probably does (if he stuck around). Your siblings are on your side. Everybody else worries about themselves.
14. Don’t be afraid to tell people to “Fuck off” when need be. It is an important skill to acquire. As they say, speak your piece, even if your voice shakes.
15. Acquire empathy, good interpersonal skills, and confidence. Learn to read body language and non-verbal communication. Don’t just concentrate on your vocational or technical skills, or you’ll find your wife fucking somebody else.
16. Keep fit.
17. Don’t speak ill of your wife/girlfriend. Back her up against the world, even if she’s wrong. She should know that you have her back. When she needs your help, give it. She should know that you’ll take her part.
18. Don’t cheat on your wife/girlfriend. If you must cheat, don’t humiliate her. Don’t risk having your transgressions come back to her or her friends. Don’t do it where you live. Don’t do it with people in your social circle. Don’t shit in your own back yard.
19. If your girlfriend doesn’t make you feel good about yourself and bring joy to your life, fire her. That’s what girlfriends are for.
20. Don’t bother with “emotional affairs.” They are just a vehicle for women to flirt and have someone make them feel good about themselves. That’s the part of a relationship they want. For you it is a lot of work and investment in time. If they are having an emotional affair with you, they’re probably fucking someone else.
21. Becoming a woman’s friend and confidant is not going to get you into an intimate relationship. If you haven’t gotten the girl within a reasonably short period of time, chances are you won’t ever get her. She’ll end up confiding to you about the sexual adventures she’s having with someone else.
22. Have and nurture friendships with women.
23. Realize that love is a numbers game. Guys fall in love easily. You’re going to see some girl and feel like you’ll die if you don’t get her. If she rejects you, move on to the next one. It’s her loss.
24. Don’t be an internet troll. Got out and live life. There is not a cadre of beautiful women advertising on Craigslist to have NSA sex with you. Beautiful women don’t need to advertise. The websites that advertise with attractive women’s photos and claims of loneliness are baloney. All they want is your money and your personal information so that they can market to you. The posts on Craigslist by young “women” seeking NSA sex, and asking for a picture are just a bunch of gay troll pic collectors. This is especially true if the post uses common gay lexicon like “hole” as in “fuck my hole” or seeks “masculine” men, or uses the word cock (except in the context of “Don’t send a cock shot.”) There are women on Craigslist. They are easily recognizable by their 2-5 paragraph postings. Most are in their 30’s or older.
25. When you become a man in full, know that people will get in your way. People who are attracted to you will somehow manage to step in your path. Gay guys will give you “the look.” Old people will somehow stumble in front of you at the worst time. Don’t get frustrated. Just step aside and go about your business. Know that these are passive aggressive methods to get you to acknowledge their existence.
26. Don’t gay bash. Don’t mentally or physically abuse people because of who they are, or how they present themselves. It’s none of your business to try to intimidate people into conformity.
27. If your gay, admit it to yourself, your parents, your friends and society at large. Be prepared to get harassed. See rule 14. If someone threatens you or assaults you, call the cops. Have them arrested. You have no obligation to self sacrifice because of who you are. As a gay person, you’ll have more social freedom than straight men. Use it to protect yourself. Be prepared to get out of Dodge if your orientation makes your life unbearable. Move to San Francisco, New York, Atlanta, or New Orleans. You’ll find a welcoming community there.
28. Don’t be a poser. Avoid being one of those dudes who puts a surfboard on top of their car, but never surfs, or a dude with a powder coated fixed gear bike and a messenger bag, but was never a messenger. Live the life. Earn your bona fides.
29. Don’t believe the crap about the patriarchy. More women are accepted and attend college. More degrees are awarded to women than men. Women outlive men. More men commit suicide. Men are twice as likely to be victims of violence, including murder. If you consider sexual assaults in prisons, twice as many men are raped as women (society thinks prison rape is funny). The streets are littered with homeless men, sprinkled with a few homeless women. Statically, women are happier than men. The myth that girls are being cheated by are educational system is belied by the fact that schools are bastions of femininity, mostly run by and taught by women. Girls outperform boys in school. It is the boys in school getting fucked over, and prescribed ritalin for being boys. Real wages for men are falling, while real wages for women are rising. Just because someone says something enough times, doesn’t make it true. You have nothing to feel guilty about.
30. Remember, 97% of all advice is worthless. Take what you can use, and trash the rest.”

Windows Phone "Mango" screenshots show off new features

Wed, 18 May 2011 13:35:24 +0100

Windows Phone "Mango" screenshots show off new features:

In the run-up to next week’s official unveiling of Windows Phone “Mango,” the forthcoming major upgrade to Microsoft’s smartphone platform, more features have been disclosed by…

The Real Reason Mike McCue Needs $50 Million: Google Is Building A Flipboard Killer

Mon, 18 Apr 2011 07:02:05 +0100

The Real Reason Mike McCue Needs $50 Million: Google Is Building A Flipboard Killer:

When news came out the other day that Flipboard just raised another $50 million at a $200 million valuation for its iPad news reading app, I gave CEO Mike McCue a hard time on Twitter and…

Why the password "this is fun" is 10 times more secure than "J4fS!2"

Sun, 17 Apr 2011 17:20:54 +0100

Why the password "this is fun" is 10 times more secure than "J4fS!2":

Comments

Friday Funny 177: What You DON'T Want to See at the Hospital

Sun, 17 Apr 2011 03:08:33 +0100

Friday Funny 177: What You DON'T Want to See at the Hospital:

One of my twitter friends (Paul Wakeford) sent me a link to this picture. This was the caption:

*Not* what you want to see on the fetal monitor when your wife begins to push. Thanks, Microsoft.

(805): He told me that "my...

Sat, 16 Apr 2011 12:34:28 +0100

(805): He told me that "my...: (805): He told me that “my little fuckpig” was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I’m in love.

All or Nothing

Tue, 11 Jan 2011 01:47:17 +0000

All or Nothing:

Graph by:

Jawad.Zairi

Use a Google Voice Number from Outside the U.S. [International]

Fri, 07 Jan 2011 19:31:29 +0000

Use a Google Voice Number from Outside the U.S. [International]:

Any post about Google Voice brings a small collection of sighs and aggravation from our non-U.S. readers: “What about us?” Here’s how you can obtain a U.S. Google Voice number and…

COUNCILS across England are to be offered incentives to collect rat-filled bags of putrefying meat and devastating viruses more often than once a fortnight.

Custom Board Game of the Day: Elliott Quince (previously) put a...

Tue, 04 Jan 2011 02:25:53 +0000

Custom Board Game of the Day: Elliott Quince (previously) put a...:

Custom Board Game of the Day: Elliott Quince (previously) put a scatological spin on a Milton Bradley classic for his nephew’s 9th birthday present. (With bonus pic of said nephew…

(705): All I heard was "I...

Mon, 03 Jan 2011 02:01:47 +0000

(705): All I heard was "I...: (705): All I heard was “I swear it’ll be funny” and then we were in jail.

Social Networking: The Future

Tue, 07 Dec 2010 06:02:44 +0000

Social Networking: The Future:

Editor’s note: This is the third of a three-part guest post by venture capitalist Mark Suster of GRP Partners on “Social Networking: The Past, Present, And Future.” Read Part I and …

(206): We have literally factored...